When push comes to shove

Eric Nelski doesn't want to tell his son not to stand up for himself.

However, when incidents involving a boy picking on his son at Suncoast Elementary School escalated from ripping up his school work to the boy scratching and hitting his son, Nelski told him to let both him and his wife handle it with the school district.

Although his son's teacher said she'd keep an eye on both children, Eric worried the problem would continue and possibly escalate. And he was right.

After being slapped across the face, Nelski said he filed a complaint with the school district. Since it was about two days before winter break, he said he was told it would take about 10 days to investigate.

But upon returning from winter break, Nelski said he and his wife received a letter in the mail saying the investigation was complete and the bullying complaint was unfounded.

"How can you start an investigation right before winter break and come back right after and just say it was unfounded?" Nelski asked. "We just couldn't believe that they took the time to really investigate. It was like they just wanted to sweep it under the rug."

Following the closed investigation, he said his son was punched in the stomach during gym class. After other similar incidents, Nelski's wife, Danielle wrote in a letter to the school district that their son was beginning to believe that no matter how many times he told on the bully for bothering him, nothing would be done. The Nelskis began to believe him.

"At one point I was meeting with the administrators and I said if they weren't going to do anything to protect my son, maybe I should tell him to fight back," Nelski said. "They told me that that could result in my son being thrown out of school. So another student hits and punches my kid and nothing is done, but my son fights back to protect himself and they say he could be kicked out of school? It makes no sense."

After reading stories in Hernando Today about a decrease in school violence in Hernando County and Brian and Catherine Vredevelds' similar problem with the bullying of their son at same school last November, Nelski said he's convinced that bullying isn't being reported at the school.

Instead, he said administrators are refusing to acknowledge bullying to keep their numbers down. In her letter to the school district, Danielle Nelski wrote that she and her husband were told by Marcia Austin, interim assistant superintendent, that the school and school district are hesitant to pursue bullying issues because of the possibility of lawsuits.

Neither Austin, Jim Knight, director of student services, Jean Ferris, principal of Suncoast, or interim Superintendent Sonya Jackson could be reached for comment by press deadline Friday.

Tired of reaching out to local officials, Nelski said he contacted the Florida State Department of Education and was told officials had received similar complaints about Suncoast Elementary.

Cheryl Etters, an information specialist for FSDE, wrote in an e-mail to Hernando Today that, to date, two complaints were submitted. As to the accuracy of bullying data, she wrote that bully data recording is a relatively new requirement for school districts and that education officials expect it to become more accurate in the future.

"As school district staff are fully trained in defining bullying incidents and behaviors, we anticipate their data will more accurately reflect the incidents at their schools," Etters wrote. "Additionally, with clarity gained in the reporting of incidents, staff will also be better prepared to prevent and address bullying behaviors."

While parents are welcome to contact the state for assistance, she said decisions on how incidents are handled remain with the school district.

"For this reason, decisions are made locally, not at the state level, when questions of this nature arise," she wrote.