Online support groups a resource for caregivers

These days, caregivers can easily access Internet websites chock full of information relating to the care of loved ones. Not only can patients and their family members gain access to valuable information, but they can connect with their peers who are struggling with similar dilemmas.

The Internet has been used to locate advice and find solutions for many years now. Some may say it has also, at times, caused serious problems as people have taken to self-diagnosis. Health professionals should still remain as the central source for any crucial health concerns.

Social networks, such as Facebook, have changed the way the world communicates. Many websites have expanded to include online caregiving communities. Here one can find peer-to-peer insights on challenging caregiving situations.

I have witnessed many of these social groups that deal specifically with Alzheimer's and dementia grow at an amazing rate. One such group on Facebook named "Memory People" is growing by almost 300 members a month!

The postings from these groups can be quite the eye opener. Reading the words written by people who are actually diagnosed with the disease themselves brings back memories of the early stages when I first started caring for my dad. After dealing with the later stages for such a long period of time, it's easy to forget about the beginning struggles the memory impaired went through early on when they were so frustrated, but still so strong.

For instance, one man described his memory loss as "losing his life's work." He wrote how the memories of his children growing up have started eroding away. Coming directly from a patient, this really brings it on a down-to-earth level.

I would never want to take away the substance one acquires from physically attending an actual support group. I've always preached the importance and value that these meetings hold. There is no replacing the merit of speaking face-to-face with someone who has walked or is walking in your shoes. But, one very important advantage you can receive from joining an online support group is that you can vent or search for advice 24/7. These websites are an optional location where you can express your concerns, while picking up a few tricks of the trade, without leaving your home. Personally, I would do both.

You can Google "online support groups" or visit the Alzheimer's Association website, www.alz.org, to find a group you may enjoy.

Like everything else in life, you may have to pick and choose to find a group that suits your individual needs best. If you begin to sense that any group has a hidden agenda of selling products or services, look elsewhere.

Read through the groups' postings before deciding whether you want to join; this is known as "lurking." Check to see if their members are supportive and how well they make new members feel welcome.

You'll want to carefully consider what message you're about to send out. If it is an angry retort to what someone else has posted, remember: All caregivers are under extreme stress. It may be wise to draft your message first, then sleep on it overnight. You may feel differently about your reply after some time has passed. It's easier to say something when you're not standing face-to-face with them, but that doesn't mean your words won't cut any deeper. One thing about the Internet, whatever you say may be around for many years to come.

Socializing online can help take away some of that feeling of isolation all caregivers go through. But it can't replace that compassionate feeling of a warm hug from family and friends; you still need to get yourself out in the real world and socialize in person.