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Hernando Today

'Nice Guys' Undermining Our Country

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By DOMENICK J. MAGLIO, Neo Traditionalist

Hernando Today

Published: August 22, 2008

Sen. John Edwards was the poster boy for the "nice guy next door." His pleasant demeanor, smile from ear to ear and flawless hair made him the perfect "sensitive husband."
Elizabeth, his wife and mother of his children, found he did not have the character and courage to stand by her while she battled cancer. This seemingly "nice guy" was parading his beautiful family in front of the camera while he was carrying on an illicit affair. He is an unprincipled hypocrite, not a nice guy.
"Nice guys finish last," is a misnomer. The expression should be: "Weak guys finish last." These "nice guys" are unwilling to control their urges, to intervene in difficult, unfair and even abusive situations. They indulge themselves and sit back waiting for someone else to solve their problems instead of doing what any self-respecting person would do.
Americans are shocked when a hideous act is committed in front of others when no one takes action to stop it. People look the other way to avoid becoming involved. It is easier and safer to be a coward than an injured or dead hero. The same goes for not standing up to group pressure in social situations. Currently it is "cool" to act like a fool in social situations, and it is "uncool" to be reserved and mature.
The tolerance of purposeless or even deviant action coaxes all of us into wanting to fit in rather than do what is right. This type of environment breeds parasitic takers and thwarts aggressive creators. When popularity and acceptance is a high priority, people will choose to ignore stupid and hurtful behavior. The majority of us are too concerned about other's reactions to voice our honest opinions. We no longer feel the need to endure the necessary hardships of being a responsible person.
"Nice guys" are not inclined to generate a "nest egg" for inevitable future health or financial difficulties. They go with the flow. When a job advancement or business opportunity is in their grasp, they do not grab hold. Instead, "nice guys" decide the additional responsibility with its added stress is not worth the future payoff. They are content with living in the moment, piling up the credit card debt while their spouse takes on more of the financial burden.
There is limited eagerness to mature into a fully functioning adult. Their lack of independence and financial security creates the inability to resist group pressure.
The need for approval by others makes them reluctant to appear "hard nosed." Nice guys shy away from giving consequences for inappropriate or even mean behavior. They understand that having strong beliefs and values means that people with opposing views may not like them. Needing to win the approval of others diffuses their resolve.
People possessing a defined belief system have reason to maintain high standards. Adhering to right and wrong motivates people to action. It is the resolve of authority figures to hold high standards that enables people to toughen up to handle life's adversities. Parents and teachers should inculcate traditional American moral values into youngsters. People of weak moral conviction, who will not be inspired to fight for freedom, cannot sustain our American exceptionalism.
Staying on top is harder than getting there. It was not "nice, weak guys" who spent their energies being politically correct or was it "wicked, evil guys" who stomped on everyone that made America the leader of the world.
No, the backbone of our nation's phenomenal success has been law-abiding citizens following the Ten Commandments and making sure their children and their community does the same. It is the people of strong, moral character, not weak-principled appeaser, who have made America great.
Keeping "nice guys" as our role models will continue the decline of our nation. "Nice guys" should be taken off their cultural pedestal and be replaced by strong, moral people. These citizens will take their rightful place as leaders worthy of being admired and followed.

Dr. Domenick J. Maglio, Ph.D., is the author of "Invasion Within" and "Essential Parenting." He is a psychotherapist and the owner/director of Wider Horizons School. Visit: www.drmaglio.com.

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